Happy Commercial Love Day!!



Yes, this is another one of those posts where I rant and rave about the world!  You see, I used to love Valentines Day as a kid, growing up in a world of hoping and praying that someone would send me a card, (other than my Mum!) or declare their love to me. 
  But now, I am surrounded by utter crap that shops these days think we humans actually want!  From red balloons, to fake red roses, red fluffy teddies holding a red heart to lame cards with utter rubbish spouted on them!  I feel its so tacky!
  I am not single as maybe you may think!  I am happily engaged to my amazing fiance and even his thoughts on this are similar to mine.  Don't get me wrong, I love being spoilt by him, pampered and bought things.  But, I don't want this one particular day to give him an excuse to do these things for me.  Why shouldnt he buy me flowers to tell me he loves on a random day in September?  I hate the fact that this country is ordering us to buy such toot at least two months before the event, when we should love our better halfs every day of the year.
  That's not to say I don't want anything!  If Dean didn't at least give me a card, I would feel a little sorry for myself!  I would definetely bring it up to his face!  Poor guy can't win!  But then being the romantic that he is, he does come home with my favourite flowers every now and then, or buys me something I have seen in a shop, or chocolates to cheer me, the whole year through.
  So, I cannot complain and I refer back to the commercialised side of Valentines day.  Even when I was out in town today, I saw last minute buys from men who either forgot to buy something for their missus or didn't get the time, girls clutching on to paper roses and plenty of bags from card shops being held on to for dear life!
  Love is personal, why share it with the world?
Sorry to everyone who celebrates this day, most of my friends have been bought beautiful bunches of flowers and although I sound bitter and jealous not to have been bought some today, I shall look forward to the random day that Dean does buy me some and then Ill show the world how loved up I am!!

Happy Valentines Day xxxx

'The Greatest Thing You'll Ever Learn Is Just To Love, And Be Loved In Return....'

To prove im not that heartless! xx

Happy days!!

A normal blog post for a change as all I seem to do is memes, photo challenges and such like!  I wanted to write a post about how happy I am because it is so rare for me to say this!
  What has brought this on?  Its winter, its dark and cold and I should be miserable!
Well, I have been miserable, three weeks worth of misery began in the build up to christmas!  I had rude people attack me, invading my life, telling me to cheer up, pushed around by mad shoppers and even some road rage managed to find its way in!  Then christmas came, I had a rotten cold, and christmas went.  My son's birthday came, I got a stomach bug, and then New Years came and suddenly, miserable me was disappearing and something else crept in.  It was not until yesterday, recovering from my stomach bug, that I began to feel happiness!
  This happiness came about for a number of reasons:

• Christmas is over, summer is approaching!
• I felt better for the first time in weeks
• I had quit one job out of two
• I have everything around me that I need, family, friends and a new home

2012 seems to be the start of something new, and maybe it is because I no longer work nights,  I mean, that job was killing me.  For two years now I have worked in restaurants, three nights a week, as well as being a Nursery Nurse at a school during the day.  I was made redundant in September at one restaurant and luckily got to be a waitress in another restaurant straight away.  However, it was taking its toll on me, my routine most days would consist of:

• Taking Dean to work for 8:30
• Take son to school for 8:40
• Start work at school 8:45
• Finsh work between 11:45 and 1:00pm
• Pop home to do chores - washing, ironing, shopping, cleaning, blogging!
• Pick up son at 3:45
• Hang around for an hour then pick up Dean from work at 5:00pm
• Sit in traffic for half an hour until dropping boys off at home
• Shoot off to sit in more traffic before starting other job at 6:00
• Finish work between 10-12:00am
• Stay up for half an hour just to wind down before bed
• Bed at 1:00am
• Repeat all steps the next day!

Writing that down now and reading it back makes me wonder how I ever survived!  Just before the kids broke up from school, I handed my notice in.  With regret, as the company trained me up to serve there and I really enjoyed my job.  However, it was affecting everything else, I hated not puttig my son to bed, I hated being tired and groggy all the time and I hated planning my whole life around night work!
  I feel so much happier now that my day ends at 5pm, instad of dropping Dean and Jacob at home and shooting off to work, I now stay at home with them. have dinner, relax, talk, read bedtime stories and chill out! 
Thats why I am happy, because I enjoy my only job, I enjoy being mummy, I enjoy being fiance and I certainly enjoy having much more time to blog!

More family time with my brothers!

Baby, its dark outside - Bring on the S.A.D!

Ugh, its glum!

Yes, it is that time of the year where I get a little bit more moany than I normally am!  I suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, (s.a.d) and seeing as the clocks went back last night, so far, I feel OK!  Well, that is actually a lie, today I feel ok, yesterday I felt the full blown effects of it.  I was very fed up, went into my own little hole, could not stop crying and just felt miserable and blue.  I dont have much to feel miserable about really.  The only thing I am stressed about is I will be moving in the next couple of weeks, which may have something to do with how I am feeling.  But, I also know that S.A.D takes me over from now until when the clocks go forward again!  So, all I aim for is March, bright light, the sun and summer clothes!

On a positive note, I do like the cosiness of having the heating on, curled up in my pyjamas, watching christmas movies and never leaving my home!

I hope that this winter, I have enough to distract me so that before I know it, it will be Spring again, once I have moved, decorated, got numerous birthdays out the way, christmas, and my birthday, we will be well on our way to the beach!

And of course, its my first winter of blogging, so I am sure that will be my biggest distraction and am looking forward to moaning a bit more on here!

The Gallery- Faces

Ooh, I have not done The Gallery for a while but this weeks theme is Faces, and I have chosen my beautiful son, Jacob, as the subject.  He ofte gets stopped in the street about how dolly-like he is, with his freckles placed just on top of his cheeks and his big brown eyes.  Of course, I am biased, but what mother couldnt kiss the face off of this gorgeous little man?!

These pictures were taken about three years ago, so he looks nothing like this any more but they capture his dolly-like features so perfectly!  He is such a big boy now,and although is still a cutie, his babyness has disappeared which I really miss!



Phew - TGI Friday!!

I finally have found the time to write a short blog post!  This time last week I did not know whether I was coming or going because I had lost my job, but this week I have been working full time at two jobs!
  I have been a Nursery Assistant at my sons school since May and it is very fulfilling and hectic.  September came and I didnt have as many hours as last term because there were less children, but due to Ofsted paying a visit and a teacher off sick, I have worked there everyday this week.
  I then found out I got the job at Toby Carvey!  A new one has opened up in my local town centre, just below my last work place at Outback so you could say it was perfect timing!  Tonight is my third shift and although I am only hosting at the moment, Im lookin forward to serving again and earning more money!

So, juggling two jobs this week has been a big challenge as Im still recovering from school holidays and the transition from one to job to another has not been entirely smooth because of the circumstances!
  But hopefully, I can settle in nicely next week and enjoy my routine more.
Im exhausted but I refuse to moan because I am fortunate to have two jobs, where some people have none, and although both help me to "just scrape by" I am so grateful to be in work.

7 Random Things About Me That You Never Knew!!



My wonderful friend, http://kate-howard.blogspot.com/2011/09/thanks-for-award.html tagged me in this link up so here goes, 7 wonderful things you never knew about moi!

1:  I have walked on Glaciers, Volcanoes, behind Waterfalls, been cave and gorge walking, seen Geysers shoot up, and all before I turned 18!

2:  My fears not only include arachnophobia, but I have an irrational fear of viaducts/archways, (which my closest friends know about!), kitchen knives and men in hooded cloaks, "a la Scream!"

3:  I still enjoy colouring in!  And not with pencils or crayons, but proper felt tip pens!  I love pattern books, detailed books and colour by number books!  I dont care, its therapeutic, relaxing and nothing more pleasurable than seeing the finished piece!

4:  Im a Fatist!  Please dont hate me for this but the day and age we live in now, I cannot get my head round how we have become so obese!  At what point do we not realise that we have became so large that its embarrassing?!!  And there is nothing worse than seeing a disgustingly large person with tight clothes on, ordering in McDonalds! 

5:  I used to be a goth/lesbian!!  LOL, i went through this crazy stage in my early twenties of dressing like a man, big gothic trousers with unflattering t-shirts, and being generally moody!  And at the same time, I fancied loads of girls and had some fun!  What a strange thing to look back on as Im far from that now.  I mean, I still love heavy metal, I just dont have the image any more!  And, I am happily settled with my man! ugh!

6:  Ive been married, divorced, widowed, lived in a womens refuge, lost my home, rebuilt my life and now have everything I have ever wanted and more!

7:  My dream jobs would be:

Retail - Paperchase / Waterstones
Restaurant - TGI Fridays!
Career - writer / journalist / party entertainer
As a child - air hostess

Phew that was hard!

I now nominate YOU to give it a go and let us into things that people never knew about you!!

Leftover Chocolate, My Son Lying and the Giggling Mummy!!

My son is such a good boy, its hard to write about him as he does not give me any material to write with! Except for the othr day, when he told his first BIG lie!!
  Part of it was my fault, I was tired, hungry and not thinking straight.  Well, thats my excuse for leaving the big, fat Aero bar lying around!  I shoved down my greedy mouth at least half the bar the night before and in my tired state, left the other cubes of chocolate on the window seal.
  Now,the rest of the story comes from my dear fiance who woke up to find an empty packet, and remembered I had not eaten it all.  You can see where this going, but its not the fact that Jacob ate my remaining 3 rows of milky chocolate first thing in the morning before breakfast.  Its the fact that he chose to lie about it, saying my brother, (who had baby sat the night before) had eaten it!  I ate the bar after my brother left, and Jacob being an only child, did not have anyone else to blame it on!!
  Ooh, how I laughed!
I had to be the adult  here however, and explain to him how its wrong to lie, (which he knew as his cheeky face beamed even harder at me!) and how its wrong to not ask if he wanted it!  Both of which I dont condone, but I still giggled my head off afterwards!

  So, if thats the worst thing my son will ever do, I cant really moan, and completely saw the funny side.  I must keep an eye on where I leave my snacks next time, bad parenting!!



365 Day Photo Challenge - 9 / 365

9 / 365 -  Todays picture comes live from our living room! It was in the news today that parents do not spend quality time with their children any more so I wanted to prove this wrong and purposefully played with Jacob, which is rare for me!! He built this beautiful fort whilst I sat and watched but did the mummy thing by cracking jokes and making him laugh!



The *C* word

I hate that word beginning with C, its not necessary to use, it makes my skin crawl and its so over used, especially at this time of the year!
  No, Im not talking about that C word, Im talking about Christmas!! 

I may be perceived as a bit of a Scrooge when it comes to these festivities, but I do like some things about this event.  Its just I dont see the point of talking about it now, its September, I'm just about recovering from my summer holidays and the last thing I want to think about is how cold it is about to get, how dark it is about to get and how over rated christmas really is these days!
  Now, Im Jewish, but that doesnt mean to say I dont put a christmas tree up in my house, and I do buy presents, have turkey, and watch Doctor Who!  But, the meaning of christmas is just not in our society any more.  Not for the majority of people that I know anyway.  For me, it is a perfect opportunity to spend time with family and friends, and now I have my son, I only make the effort for him.  It is a magical time and I do look back at my childhood when we celebrated xmas with great fondness and nostalgia, which I would love to regain for my little boy.
  These are the things I hate most about the *C* word:

• People are planning, buying and taling about it now, in September
• It doesnt help that commercially retailers feel the need to put their xmas products and cards out now when some of us have just stepped off a plane!
• its all about presents rather than the magic and meaning of what its all about, children expect presents whether they have been good or bad for the simple fact that its all so commercial!
• people wasting their money on gifts they would never normally buy, and that it brings our the greedy side of us
• talking about xmas in autumn means that winter is approaching and all I can see ahead of me is darkness, not even pretty xmas lights can snap me out of this!
• deciding whose house we will go to for xmas dinner, I would rather go on holiday somewhere

But, before you think my grumpiness is just in the minority of people, (which it probably is!), here are my reasons for looking forward to xmas:

• It comes and goes and by that time it will be spring!
• Seeing the joy on my little boys face when he sees Santa has been
• the cosiness, warmth and laziness of being indoors all wrapped up, watching xmas tv
• celebrating and partying with family and friends
• wrapping presents!

So, Im not against xmas entirely, Im just against talking about it 4 months before hand, when really it is only one day, we just make it last for half a year!  I know I will have a good xmas yet again, but ideally, I would like to escape from it all, it turns me into a mean, bitchy girl when I do my xmas shopping a week beforehand!



The Gallery - Birth

This weeks theme over at http://stickyfingers1.blogspot.com/search/label/The%20Gallery is Birth. 

I dont have any photos on my laptop that I could have used for this theme so I have uploaded these two, (apologies for the poor quality!).  They show pictures of my son on his first ever day and I put them into a scrap book that I made from the age of 0-5. 
  The first picture was taken when Jacob was about 12 hours old and is my favourite of him.  The second picture is a page I made for the scrapbook, detailing his important bits!!

It was and still is, one of the most incredible days of my life and such a surreal experience.  I wont go into details as we all know how we entered the world, but I was in labour for two days overall, but 5 hours once I got to hospital.  I only had gas & air as they refused me an epidural, (which Im quite pleased about in hindsight!) and after a little panic where his heartbeat slowed down, Jacob was born just as it began to snow outside!!  I fell in love with him instantly and being a mum to him is the best job out of the three I do!!  I still think about this day at least once a week as I cant believe I went through it, but I would gladly do it all again as its so rewarding!!  Watch this space......!!!

Mum - son + things to do = YOU CAN COME HOME NOW!!

Yes, I have had the luxury of having five days without my one and only son, as he has been visiting his grandparents in Leicester.  I have certainly used this opportunity to get the househld jobs done that have been piling up over the weeks that I have been working, without my little man getting under my feet.  The jobs on my list that I have managed to complete are:

• cleaning
• doing the paperwork
• getting the cream carpets finally cleaned!
• sending off my first assingment for my college course
• tidying up
• ironing, washing

Excellent, I have managed to get the household back on track after three months of me doing no housework! Sounds disgusting, (it wasnt as bad as it sounds!) but working two jobs and playing mummy has its downfalls, like having no time!!
  However, I would like my son back now please!  Yes, its been great having some free time to do all these chores, squeezing in a trip to the cinema, a drink with friends and visiting family, even not having Cbeebies on was pure heaven!  But, now I want to be a Mum again, I dont really want or need the free time without my son, he isnt a hassle, he is a dream and I am really missing his chatter even though he repeats the same songs over and over again!! I miss the whining, the moaning, the odd tantrum and the nagging, and boy, I never thought I would hear myself say that!!
  So Jacob, hurry home, mummy has the following planned for you:

• Trip to the museum
• Beach days out
• Swimming
• Park days out
• Legoland
• Cinema to see Cars 2 and The Smurfs
• Seeing your school friends

Lets complete the summer holidays together, but mind the carpets, they've just been cleaned!!!

Becoming a juggler!! (an old post, as yet un-published!)

I was inspired today to write a blog about my hectic lifestyle - if you think this will be glamour, glitter and goregousness, think again!!
  I want to re-name my job title, just like most mothers, as a juggler.
Definition - "Juggling" may be used metaphorically, like "multi-tasking," to mean constantly refocusing attention among responsibilities, such as in the title of Juggling Work and Family. ^{[2][3]
 
My responsibilities at the moment are working at a restaurant, working as a nursery assistant, being a mummy, home maker and having time for my family and friends!! This definitely justifies the above definition in my eyes. 
  A typical day for me is getting up to take my son to school who is two bus rides there, getting two bus rides back home, doing the housework or working as a nursery assistant, doing the shopping, getting two bus rides back to pick my son up and another two bus rides to get home, putting the dinner on, going to work at the restaurant and home again!!
  8 bus rides a day is tiring in itself but totally worth it to get my son the best education.  My jobs are important to me and having the money means I can support my family.  I have worked hard to gain my confidence back after having a rough ride over the years so to be able to juggle everything in my life is actually quite rewarding and not very often do i moan about it unless i am having an extremely tiring day!!
  So where do i get the time to begin my main ambition which is to be a writer?  That is the title I am aiming for, and there will be a lot of hard work put into getting it.  Its hard to find the motivation at the end of a long day, when all I want to do is relax in front of the tv!!  Some days I have more time to do writing than others but even then, I set out to do something productive but end up gettig distracted by something else!!} 

My Son and His Technical Side!!

My son is five and a half and yet he knows how to complete guitar hero quicker than me!!  Im still working out how to coordinte my brain with my hands in order to click four coloured buttons to win the game!!
  This has provoked me into writing a quick blog on children and their games consoles.
Now, before my son got clever, I refused to let him play with such items, I dislike the "lazy parenting" way of plonking your child in front of the tv for a quiet life, but we have all been guilty of this, especially me!!  Which is why my son is now a pro at every game he owns and says he is bored when I dont let him on there, even though he has a bedroom full of toys!! 
  However, I have seen a slight advantage or two, of why games at such a young age can be good:

1: It taught my son to read the words, yes, no, exit, start and continue!!
2: It promotes playing fairly, through team work, challenges and single player!!
3: It helps his coordination in the areas that I have failed to progress!
4: It helps him use his imagination through play - when not on his consoles, he imrpovises what he has seen and inputs this into his playtime.

I still dislike my son spending hours on games consoles, I fear for his eye sight, (already being too close to the screen), his concentration span, (he definetely cannot hear anything I ask him, unless its to do with chocolate or a new game!) and his social life, although with the way technology is going, the future of socialising looks set to be an indoor gathering through the tv rather than down the pub!!  I may have made this sound like my son plays constantly on his xbox, (which he does!) but I make sure that as a responsible mother, he has a good education by doing his homework before I lose him to the screen, he gets a decent amount of excersise by playing at the park, and that he eats his fruit and vegetables to give him extra energy to play on his playstation!!
  Whatever happened to playing with sticks, leaves and toy cars?!!!